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Old 30-07-2022, 08:15 AM   #1
EyelinerAndCigarettes
 
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How to deal when things are overwhelming?

How do I deal with all the grown up things when they are so overwhelming?

I'm doing this heavy work in trauma therapy and then as soon as I'm home it's cleaning, food, and family stuff. Then I'm trying to deal with the ED stuff and then I also see the MH people and I have a charity involved and then on top, I have medical appointments to get to and to look after my mum and all the while I'm just overflowing.

It's making me feel really really low, like how do I carry on low.

My CPN keeps saying this therapy is a 'means to an end' and just to keep going and going but I'm struggling immensely. I wish I could switch everything off.

Slight vent, sorry. Just yeah, how do people cope?? I know everyone has stuff to do and deal with daily but how??







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Old 30-07-2022, 06:46 PM   #2
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Honestly, I don't cope with it either. I can really relate.

I basically try to figure out what absolutely needs to get done, and what I can let go and not do. I think the other option might be seeking out more support to help with some of those things too, if that is an option.

I don't know, even just little swaps can sometimes help. Buying pre cooked or pre prepared foods, eating off of paper/plastic dishes so you don't have dishes to wash, stuff like that are things I do. I also do things like put a load of laundry in right before I go out, so I know that once I am home again I need to swap it or put it away.



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Old 30-07-2022, 09:10 PM   #3
Elmer
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Correct me if I'm completely wrong here, but it sounds a lot like there's an expectation that you should be doing a lot of caring for others, while juggling everything else you're having to deal with. I know that a large percentage of that is unavoidable as a parent, but you mention caring for your mum - are there any options for help in that area? I don't know the story but could social care help take some of that load from you? I can imagine that's a whole lot more red tape in the immediate future, but long term it might make things a little less heavy for you?

As Camden said, small changes can make quite a big difference - maybe lower the pressure on yourself to do things perfectly? With the really heavy therapy you're doing, it seems reasonable to maybe give yourself a pass on some things - as long as everyone is safe and fed and content, does it matter if the house is a little more messy than usual?

Having said all that, I can't begin to imagine how stressful everything is for you right now, and how a lot of things are easier said than done. I do hope that you get the support you need and deserve to make life a little more manageable.



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Old 31-07-2022, 03:04 PM   #4
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Thank you for the kind words.

I have tried to broach the subject of someone who isn't me or my nan caring but it's really difficult for her.
However, I will see what I can do to try and do less of the things/swap things around, but it's very hard and it seems I have to be everywhere at once all while processing this therapy stuff. I keep telling my CPN etc that I am overwhelmed but no one seems to know how to help me and they keep asking me what I need... but I have no idea. Sigh.

Thank you for listening to me <3















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Old 31-07-2022, 07:52 PM   #5
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I mean, not to point out the obvious, but from what I can tell it sounds like you need less things to deal with! I know that's not super specific or tangible to say though.

I'm sorry things are so hard and you have so much going on. It really does sound like too much for one human to cope with.



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