Darkwings, if somebody Said that to you they are an utter piece of shit!!! You never chose to be born, you never chose your family or the circumstances you grew up in. So how can everything be your fault???
You are valuable because you're a human being and you deserve to be loved and treated with respect <3
i asked stanta if i could be normal i wrote him saying everything that i cant say aloud to people and he still didnt do it....ALL I WANT WAS TO BE NORMAL!!!!!!
i didnt want anything else!!!!!!!!! NOTHING!!!!!!!!!!!... so now i have to pray to god to make me normal but i dont think that he will do it ether.......
just another floating iceberg in this ocean we call life...….
Am I a failure from birth
Is misery what I deserve
Am I just so void of love
That I'm never good, never good enough
~citizen soldier-never good enough
Hey darkwings. I've been wondering where you've been.
Neither Santa or God have those sorts of powers, as far as I know.
Normality is overrated. Look at my avatar. Be proud to be different. It's not easy, I know. But you are who you are and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.
Yeah I got in trouble and the staff took away the laptop and my iPod for a few months (since November)
I really don’t know what to do…….
I really don’t know if I can be proud of myself……… I hate myself for being disabled!!!! Life would be better if I ether was non disabled or dead EVERYTHING AND EVERYONE would be better
Last edited by Darkwings44 : 31-12-2021 at 01:06 AM.
Reason: Changed the emoji’s and stuff
just another floating iceberg in this ocean we call life...….
Am I a failure from birth
Is misery what I deserve
Am I just so void of love
That I'm never good, never good enough
~citizen soldier-never good enough
Would they though? "People" won't necessarily be different if you're not disabled. It's not in your power to change "people" and "everything" but the thing you can change is your outlook. You're not a lesser human for being disabled and I actually think that people who are disadvantaged physically or mentally often have a better outlook, are more realistic, are more empathetic, are more accepting than those who aren't. So that makes you a good and worthwhile person exactly as you are and you need to somehow learn to see that.
Last edited by nonperson : 31-12-2021 at 07:18 PM.
I think you're in the US, but have you heard of the British Comedian Rosie Jones? She is disabled (and gay!) and hopefully could be a bit of a role model for you in terms of accepting yourself the way you are and not seeing being disabled as something negative.
Would they though? "People" won't necessarily be different if you're not disabled. It's not in your power to change "people" and "everything" but the thing you can change is your outlook. You're not a lesser human for being disabled and I actually think that people who are disadvantaged physically or mentally often have a better outlook, are more realistic, are more empathetic, are more accepting than those who aren't. So that makes you a good and worthwhile person exactly as you are and you need to somehow learn to see that.
Their lives would be very different……….
I really don’t know how to do that I’m sorry
just another floating iceberg in this ocean we call life...….
Am I a failure from birth
Is misery what I deserve
Am I just so void of love
That I'm never good, never good enough
~citizen soldier-never good enough
I think you're in the US, but have you heard of the British Comedian Rosie Jones? She is disabled (and gay!) and hopefully could be a bit of a role model for you in terms of accepting yourself the way you are and not seeing being disabled as something negative.
In addition there's the comedian and actor Francesca Martinez who is disabled too. AFAIK she isn't gay but she has done some campaigning around disability issues so another positive disabled role model for you to research.
Wannabe CPN : -)
"He who is tired of Weird Al is tired of life." - Homer Simpson "I hear those voices that will not be drowned" Sanity is a nasty disease. The world would be a happier place without it. - Rilic
RIP Kat 4th July 1987- 11th June 2013
In addition there's the comedian and actor Francesca Martinez who is disabled too. AFAIK she isn't gay but she has done some campaigning around disability issues so another positive disabled role model for you to research.
thank you i watched her video on youtube shes funny!
just another floating iceberg in this ocean we call life...….
Am I a failure from birth
Is misery what I deserve
Am I just so void of love
That I'm never good, never good enough
~citizen soldier-never good enough
i really feel like theres no end.............. expect to die................. i have no way to cope with everything because i have nothing to cope with and i havent talked to my therpist in a long time!
just another floating iceberg in this ocean we call life...….
Am I a failure from birth
Is misery what I deserve
Am I just so void of love
That I'm never good, never good enough
~citizen soldier-never good enough
The following content has been hidden - Reason : Sent this to my therapist
Today is my day to clean my clothes and usually DH helps me put them out of the washer because the washer is very deep and I’m too short to do that and most of the time when I use the step stool it slips and I almost fall but last week I did my clothes on a different day and mrs T was on duty and didn’t let DH help me with my clothes but she helped me get a little of my clothes (the ones I couldn’t reach) and called mrs S and told her that I have to get my clothes all by myself and so today When I finished washing my clothes mrs Sonya told me that I had to do it all by myself and that no one can help me and That I had to figure it out myself so I tried to do that but everything I tried didn’t work out (tipping the washer over, using the ends of the mops, using the spatula (mrs S caught me before I could use it), using tongs (couldn’t find it) ) I told her countless times that I needed help with it and that I couldn’t do it myself and every time she said ‘no they said that you have to do it on your own’ and when she said use the step stool I asked her if she wanted to fall and she said that they wanted me to fall not her and I asked her if I could call the boss of the group home and she said no.. so finally I tried using the step stool but Each time I almost fell and the last time I tried it I said that if I fell it’s going to be there fault (not mrs S) then she yelled at me and said “it’s going to your fault you don’t know how to use the step stool!!!!” so after a few try’s later using the step stool (almost fell each time) I gave up and started the dryer with the other clothes still inside the washer and then she got mad and said that she was going to write me up and I said “I can’t do it myself go ahead and do the write up because I need help and you won’t do that” so she called the other staff (mrsM, mrs T) but not the boss of the group home because as she said “he’s going to be like help her and I don’t have time for that mess” but in the end she got fed up and got DH to get the rest of the clothes out of the washer and in the dryer so yeah…
I’m really triggered and don’t know what to do
Last edited by Darkwings44 : 09-01-2022 at 11:29 PM.
Reason: Fixed it
just another floating iceberg in this ocean we call life...….
Am I a failure from birth
Is misery what I deserve
Am I just so void of love
That I'm never good, never good enough
~citizen soldier-never good enough
Oh gosh, that doesn't sound good at all- are you able to speak to the boss of the group home about what happened? I hope your therapist gets back to you soon.
i feel like im in the darkness of my own mind and self harm is the only light i have but i dont have self harm anymore!!!! i feel like dying just to prove that i am depressed!!!!!! the psychiatrist sent to the boss of the group home notes and one of them was that i am not depressed and that i have schizophrenia!!!!!!!!! even though last appointment i told him that i felt like shit and that ive been feeling like on edge!!! like im swallowed up in the darkness of my own mind and like shattering every mirror that i look into because i hate myself so much!! maybe when i die everyone will see the truth!!!!!!!!!
just another floating iceberg in this ocean we call life...….
Am I a failure from birth
Is misery what I deserve
Am I just so void of love
That I'm never good, never good enough
~citizen soldier-never good enough
Curveball
