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Old 07-06-2021, 10:01 PM   #621
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Originally Posted by Darkwings44 View Post
ive had it with my dna family!!!!!!!! i want to erase everything that relates us as cousins!!!!!!!!!!!! more info on my r/v thread.... i have die soon before the week is up.......
This sounds worrying. Do you mean that you're having thoughts of ending your life?



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Old 07-06-2021, 10:17 PM   #622
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yes.............. i really want to drain all of the DNA (blood) from me before friday......



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Old 07-06-2021, 10:57 PM   #623
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pi.R^2 View Post
I'm not trying to say you weren't emotionally abused or anything like that, I'm guessing you have other reasons for thinking that besides the video you shared? I was only saying that some of the signs that it mentioned were quite vague- for example feeling a lot of guilt could also come from a really strict education, being a perfectionist etc.
yeah i do...

ohhh ok



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Old 07-06-2021, 11:40 PM   #624
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So, uh. DNA isn't just in blood. It's encoded into pretty much every tissue and organ in your body. So even if you had a way to remove all the blood from your body, you'd still have DNA.

DNA isn't just about ties to blood family if that's helpful to know. Combined with RNA it's how your organs and pretty much every single cell in your body are made and told how to function, and how that's changed over billions of years to make you human. DNA is really cool, and many of its uses in science that I know of aren't related to family ties at all. There are some cool genetic things that can be done with it as it relates to human health and medicine sure, but it can also be useful for things like tracing traits over evolutionary time, like in biology and paleontology too. Even single celled organisms have DNA. It's just part of what makes life life. It's nothing to do with family per say.



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Old 08-06-2021, 02:41 AM   #625
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oh.....i didnt know that...... :(

i want to die in order to not be my cousins family..... she ruined the only real life best friendship that i had since brianna..... she did that to ruin any chance i have of creating a family outside of her and my dna family........ I HATE HER SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!! if i die then i wont be a part of her family anymore. problem solved......



just another floating iceberg in this ocean we call life....


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Old 08-06-2021, 09:43 PM   #626
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I still consider my dead relatives to be part of my family, so I'm not sure I can follow your logic here.

Could you try cutting all ties with your cousin as a last dangerous way of separating yourself from her?


Last edited by Pi.R^2 : 08-06-2021 at 09:52 PM.


We may not see eye to eye, but we can respect each other's opinions and find the truth in them.
Perhaps in those honest conversations, instead of demonising each other,
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Old 09-06-2021, 12:45 AM   #627
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if im dead then i wont be on earth with her or her family.

tried that. it didnt work.... i found out that she and her family was going to vist me for my birthday at my moms house this weekend and i emailed my mom that i wouldnt be able to vist her (even though i didnt break any of the rules that would not allow me to go so that was a lie) then she emailed me why?? what happened??? and i emailed her that i was busy. (also lie) then she emailed me what do you mean your busy??? then i got angry and responed back "CANCEL MY BIRTHDAY OK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! JUST DO IT OK?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

i have to plan my death its the only way to separate me from them.


Last edited by Darkwings44 : 09-06-2021 at 12:46 AM. Reason: added more info


just another floating iceberg in this ocean we call life....


Am I a failure from birth
Is misery what I deserve
Am I just so void of love
That I'm never good, never good enough
~citizen soldier-never good enough

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Old 09-06-2021, 01:15 AM   #628
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i just emailed my therpist
the email:
i found out that my cousin and her family was going to vist me for my birthday at my moms house this weekend and i emailed my mom that i wouldnt be able to vist her (even though i didnt break any of the rules that would not allow me to go so that was a lie) then she emailed me why?? what happened??? and i emailed her that i was busy. (also lie) then she emailed me what do you mean your busy??? then i got angry and responed back "CANCEL MY BIRTHDAY OK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! JUST DO IT OK?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

i have to plan my death its the only way to separate me from them. i want to die in order to not be my cousins family........ she trys to ruin any chance i have of creating a family outside of her and my dna family........ I HATE HER SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!! if i die then i wont be a part of her family anymore. if im dead then i wont be on earth with her or her family. problem solved....



just another floating iceberg in this ocean we call life....


Am I a failure from birth
Is misery what I deserve
Am I just so void of love
That I'm never good, never good enough
~citizen soldier-never good enough

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Old 09-06-2021, 02:25 AM   #629
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i sent a email to my mom apologize to her and she told me that the cousions TC and her family (the cousins that hurt me) wont be coming this weekend so i said that i'll come to her house this weekend but…. I still wanna plan my death…. I cant take life anymore but I’ll have to die after my birthday so it wont ruin my moms weekend......(i probraly allready ruined my moms day after the angery email that i sent her) .....


Last edited by Darkwings44 : 09-06-2021 at 02:29 AM. Reason: made it clearer


just another floating iceberg in this ocean we call life....


Am I a failure from birth
Is misery what I deserve
Am I just so void of love
That I'm never good, never good enough
~citizen soldier-never good enough

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Old 09-06-2021, 09:02 AM   #630
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I hate to be blunt but don’t you think your mom will be upset if you kill yourself?

Does she know what happened with your cousins? Because if she did it might help you with separating yourself from them.

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Old 10-06-2021, 12:05 AM   #631
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...........yes.......

no..... i dont know if she would believe me...........



just another floating iceberg in this ocean we call life....


Am I a failure from birth
Is misery what I deserve
Am I just so void of love
That I'm never good, never good enough
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Old 10-06-2021, 02:12 AM   #632
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im kind of looking forward to going to my moms house this weekend!!!



just another floating iceberg in this ocean we call life....


Am I a failure from birth
Is misery what I deserve
Am I just so void of love
That I'm never good, never good enough
~citizen soldier-never good enough

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Old 14-06-2021, 10:17 PM   #633
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I hope you had a nice weekend at your mom's house.



We may not see eye to eye, but we can respect each other's opinions and find the truth in them.
Perhaps in those honest conversations, instead of demonising each other,
we might see each other as imperfect humans, doing our best. ~ Jodi Picoult


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Old 15-06-2021, 01:43 AM   #634
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for the most part i did!!



just another floating iceberg in this ocean we call life....


Am I a failure from birth
Is misery what I deserve
Am I just so void of love
That I'm never good, never good enough
~citizen soldier-never good enough

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Old 15-06-2021, 02:01 AM   #635
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my therpist is going to come and see me on this wensday at least thats what she last emailed me but she didnt say what time...



just another floating iceberg in this ocean we call life....


Am I a failure from birth
Is misery what I deserve
Am I just so void of love
That I'm never good, never good enough
~citizen soldier-never good enough

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Old 16-06-2021, 09:52 PM   #636
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I'm glad you had a generally good time at the weekend.

Did your therapist end up coming to see you today?



We may not see eye to eye, but we can respect each other's opinions and find the truth in them.
Perhaps in those honest conversations, instead of demonising each other,
we might see each other as imperfect humans, doing our best. ~ Jodi Picoult


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Old 17-06-2021, 01:00 AM   #637
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thank you!!!!

yeah i didnt tell her much though....... but i did email her a link to my story...



just another floating iceberg in this ocean we call life....


Am I a failure from birth
Is misery what I deserve
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Old 17-06-2021, 01:29 AM   #638
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my ED thread......

https://www.recoveryourlife.com/foru...80#post4302280



just another floating iceberg in this ocean we call life....


Am I a failure from birth
Is misery what I deserve
Am I just so void of love
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Old 20-06-2021, 08:44 PM   #639
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im feeling overwelmed by alot of things.... i really want self harm but i dont have anything good enough to do it with!!!



just another floating iceberg in this ocean we call life....


Am I a failure from birth
Is misery what I deserve
Am I just so void of love
That I'm never good, never good enough
~citizen soldier-never good enough

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Old 23-06-2021, 12:48 AM   #640
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im on the edge right now i really need to cut but i cant!!!!!



just another floating iceberg in this ocean we call life....


Am I a failure from birth
Is misery what I deserve
Am I just so void of love
That I'm never good, never good enough
~citizen soldier-never good enough

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