I've been thinking about doing my food shopping during the quiet hours supermarkets offer for a while, because sometimes the music and the general 'busyness' trigger meltdowns. This was especially true over Xmas and the new year, and although that period is over in general food shopping is a really stressful activity for me (just ask my old flatmate, I'm surprised she didn't murder me in the middle of Asda sometimes!)
I don't know if anyone has tried these quiet hours? What are they like, if so? Do they just not play music, or are they generally quieter because 'normal' (hate that word but you know what I mean) just don't get let in?
Any experiences welcome, and if you've any tips on how to make food shopping less stressful without quiet hours then those are also welcome :)
I don't know about the official "quiet hours" as I don't see how they can actually police who is let in and who isn't... or are they just relying on customers being sensible and not going during that time if they don't need quiet?
Either way, I tend to go really late at night, like an hour before the shop closes, usually on a Saturday and, after having recently been going a bit earlier at 6 or 7ish, I'd forgotten how quiet and peaceful it is later in the evenings. Sometimes the shelves can be a bit empty and the music is still on, and the evening staff can get in the way a bit but there are hardly any other customers around. I think some places do turn the music and the light levels down as well. Would that be an option?
I don't know... I know they turn the music off (which is sometimes ridiculously loud) but other than that I don't know what else they do. Our Tesco does have a trafflic light system (don't know if all Tescos do) that's red when you can't go into the store, but I have seen people ignore it.
I have done that before, it was helpful. The only issues I had were the big cages full of stock, I had to navigate round them. Also, Tesco is for some reason better than Asda so might start going to Tesco late at night.
Also might be a stupid question (so many people have reassured me about this) but do you think people are bothered when I'm being slow? I can sometimes have meltdowns at checkouts (and avoid self scan checkouts like the plague) because people make rude comments. I know I shouldn't let them bother me, but it upsets me how different life is now to when I was living with my parents where I could go out with no issues.
i sometimes go to the morrisions "quiet hour" I love it. They turn the lights down, turn the radio off, the beeps are turned off at the checkouts, might be a few other differences too I am not sure... it just feels less hectic in general and it's amazing to be able to go into a shop without sunglasses on (I have stupidly sensitive eyes). There do also feel like there's less people in there, but not sure if that is just a corincidence, or it just feels liek less people because I am not on the verge of sensoory overwhelm
I always go late in the evening on a weekday. I know our stores and things are different but the stores here that I go to never play music. That sounds awful. They are also way less busy at night during the week.
For me I make a grocery list that is in order of where the things are in the store and I color code it with high priority things being one color and lower priority things being a different color. If I get too overwhelmed I can just grab the high priority things.
I always use the self scan myself because I can take my time with it and do not have to interact with another human. They very rarely have the actual aisles with the cashier staffed anyways.
Re others being bothered about you being slow - who knows, who cares. Some may be, some may not be, but it's irrelevant imo. You are allowed to go at the pace that you need and the other humans can deal with it. That's not on you.
Do you wear any type of ear plug or noise cancelling headphones? Or take fidgets? I usually have a few fidgets with me when I go.
Please do not give me virtual hugs unless you are only using the hug function on threads. Thanks.
You can't always keep it separate.
This is happening, this is part of you.
They do still play music late at night, I find its sometimes often even louder because it is less busy. I did go during the night before the pandemic, stores still aren't back to 24 hours but I could manage to pop into Tescos at night sometimes, that's a good idea.
I also like the idea of a coloured grocery list, Camden. I often go every day (which I know probably doesn't help make the whole experience easier) but by using a colour coded list a weekly food shop type thing might be an easier way. I'm going to tell V your idea so that she can help me implement it if you don't mind? We sometimes still go food shopping together.
I know, I just get flustered when I think people are annoyed at me. I've just worked out in therapy its one of my major triggers for reasons I won't go into here, and it's hard to not be aware of the things people are saying. V, N and other people have all said that if they're annoyed, to turn round and make it obvious that they're being dicks which I'm going to start doing too.
I do wear noise cancelling headphones when I'm by myself, yeah. I also always have chewing gum on me because the minty taste in my mouth helps me calm down/my anxiety. I'm not big on fidget toys (prefer chewing gum, it works better for me) but I think I'll give them another go to see if they make the whole experience easier.
Definitely discuss the color coded list with V if you want, we don't mind! And yes, at this point I only go once every other week or once a week myself, and I tend to like eating the same things. So I find it pretty easy to work out which things I need to get all the time and can wait on. I also have a car and drive there though, so I don't have to worry about needing to carry what I get with me for any distance. I can understand why that might be an issue if you have to walk or take public transit there.
I also built myself up a decent stockpile over the last year or so by doing grocery delivery. Unsure if that's an option where you live though?
I think if you're wearing noise cancelling headphones, you can even just pretend you don't hear someone if they make comments or are annoyed!
Please do not give me virtual hugs unless you are only using the hug function on threads. Thanks.
You can't always keep it separate.
This is happening, this is part of you.
I have never once made it to a quiet time at a supermarket. Every time I go in I look at the sign and think ‘that sounds perfect I’ll give it a try’ like it’s an absolutely novel idea. On repeat. For months. Or I’ll suddenly remember it’s quiet hour and not need anything, because I went the day before, saw the sign and went ‘that sounds perfect, I’ll give it a try’
You know how it is.
'It's an impossible choice ... I'll just have to hope that when I flip the coin it somehow explodes and kills me.'
"You're not scared of climbing mountains. You're scared that you can't make them move."
Camden, I did used to get food delivered but often here they don't have slots for several days. The last time V needed food shopping, she had to change supermarket because there weren't any slots for a week. I agree that its a good way to get food in, especially since neither V or I drive its just more often than not more hassle than its worth.
I've done the same thing for months too Lio. The only thing putting me off was how early they were doing them, but Asdas is at 2-3pm so might be more doable.
