I Think I want to, but I feel like i can't, you know?

[xXKatXx4]

I'm sorry, for being me. and i'm sorry if im wasting your time, and you dont care, I just kinda wanted someone to talk to.

So, If you read this thanks for that:)
I guess the title of this is obvious, I'm such a confused kid. lol
I want help but dont, I want to listen to my psycologist and take a step towards not hurting myself, so i dont feel crazy anymore...I asked for help, cuz i wanted it...at first. now I feel like im doing it for my family's sake, which seems like a great reason I love them, but Is it the right reason?And is it weird I dont WANT their support? I dont want them to feel bad and I wish I kept it a secret? I hate the attention and I think its rediculous people assume cutters cut for attention -_- (sorry mini rant)

My psycologist wants me to get a psyciatrist but what i dislike is she wants me to move my blade...yesI know its an inatimate object. And I know there are plenty of other things an blades out there, but i can't move it, and im not sure I want to, you know? I know its sad and pathetic but its become my best friend...the only thing thats dependable and is ALWAYS there.should i get rid of it? even though I know I'm not ready?

[trekkinthrulife]

Of course we care! I care. How you feel is normal and your not the only one who feels that way. There is nothing wrong with wanting to stop for your family, that is great reason 2 stop. I don't know how successful your recovery will be if you dont want to stop for YOU.

As for the blades...its up to you. The truth is if you want to hurt yourself you'll find away even if it isn't w/ the tool you prefer. If your having urges and want to ignore them then yes I would get rid of the blades bc they make giving in a lot easier. At least in my case

[UnIvErSaLoNe]

Talk to Trekkin shes a good person!

I wish you the best!


Sincerely,
me

[R-Jay]

Hey, I'm sorry I don't have any advice, I'm pretty confused myself right now.
I just wanted to say that I've read and that I care. You can PM me anytime if you want to chat, I'd love to talk.
Take care hun xxxx

[wareagle07]

Stopping for your family is a good reason, as long as it is a good reason to you. You need a reason that will motivate you when you feel like you're going to give in, whether that's stopping because you're flat out sick of cutting, or whatever it is. For me, getting rid of the blades made it easier, but I had to get rid of my primary and 2 or 3 replacement ones I had after that before it worked well. Best of luck! PM me anytime :)

[xXKatXx4]

Thank you all so much, You seem like amazing people so I think I'll take you're advice, just reachingout to a complete stranger means u must be amazing, And thanks for caring, and making me feel less alone. <3 <3 <3

I just hope I have the courage and will power to stop because honestly idk if my family will be my reason to stop cause theyre all kinda leaving lol