Wow I genuinely felt empowered and motivated reading your response .Thank you so much. I will definitely take your advice actually to write everything down. I'm used to forgetting what I was going to say in these things and remembering on the way home (eugh!) so that will be a bonus but I feel like I could really benefit from the promts to actually say some things that I might be trying to hold back from expressing.
I'm in this different world now of wanting everyone to see how well I'm doing and being seen to be taking things in my stride so it's quite difficult to let those barriers down at times but if I have things written down infront of me, even if just briefly key worded, and I set myself a goal from that very first session that I need to discuss these things then it will give me more of an incentive to push them through instead of deceiving myself that they don't matter and "that bit will be fine " and pushing them to the back of my mind.
Yea, thank you!
I got my letter. It was a summary of what we had discussed and stated that 1:1 psychology is going to be best because a lot of my deep rooted religious/spiritual beliefs (that bring me so much clarity at times) are tied into this mess and there was mention of some things being linked to my childhood which I really didn't want to hear/read but maybe I have to and if that is the source of this then I just have to suck it up and sort it out. but I can't even let my mind go there right now because I'll just freak out and get defensive. I have a few months before I have to dig deep though so I can park those thoughts for now until psychology starts and it's time to commit.
By the way, how good is it that there's only a 3 month wait?! It's pretty much unheard of. Granted most of my therapy has been IP but i've waited upto 12 months for it in the community before and spoke to lots of people who have had the same issue. It's good. Got to give credit where it's due.
'Night
M x
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