Even the church don't seem to believe that the spirits are real spirits. Everyone thinks it's some form of mental illness. But it's not. And all teh diagnoses are frustrating me so much, my Mum's going on about it being my ocd and I jsut want to scream and shout that all of them having their own ideas about what's wrong with me isn't helping. My Mum gets cross with me when I refer to the spirits as spirits, but that's what they are.
I see the doctor at 2 today. I think I'm safe from being sectioned because the nurse didn't start on about it yesterday evening. They said they want to change my medication drastically. I'm currently on Abilify 20mg (and I cant' tolerate a higher dose) Diazepam 8mg including prn (which I'm having to take every day) Timazepam technically 10 mg but I'm takign 20 and still can't sleep (they know this), carbamezapine 300mg (does nothing) and clomipramine, which keeps me ocd in check. They're saying I need a better sedative than diazepam and a stronger sleeping pill (I've no idea what this would be, any ideas, I've been on zolpiclone and was on it so long it doesn't work anymore) and they want to change my antipsychotics. I'm contesting the Borderline Diagnosis I'e had pinend on me since I turned 18 and getting a second opinion, but that will wait until I'm more stable. They're talking about the Early Intervention Team also.
Thank you so much for your support.
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