You need to think about what solutions may work best for you. Is it something you want to do alone or do you think you would benefit from some external help? If you want help from someone else, do you want to consider seeing some professionals or talk first to a family member or friend? There are a lot more options than simply taking a box of anti depressants. Its also worth pointing out that nobody can force any treatment on you ( unless you're under section obv which is EXTREMELY unlikely), so if you were offered anti depressants you have every right to refuse them. But you will never know what things might be available until you ask.
In terms of professionals, the first thing to do is often to go and see your GP. If they are any good at all, they should discuss ALL your options with you and not just right out a prescription. You could explain that you felt anti depressants didnt help in the past and would like to know what other things are available. They may be able to help you access counselling, psychological support etc if that is a route you wished to explore.
You could also consider if there are any other local drop in services that you could use, or a charity supportline or email service, who might be able to give you some support and help you decide how you would like to approach the situation. This obviously depends what services are available to you locally and nationally. In the UK, Mind run drop in services in many areas and there is also Rethink who run telephone support in certain areas of the country.
Do you have an action plan for when you feel yourself starting to pick a fight with your boyfriend? This could be very useful in the mean time for helping you make changes. If you sat down together perhaps and agreed some steps you will take when you are about to lose your temper. For example step 1. You remove yourself from the room step 2. You take a few deep breaths step 3. you have an activity (healthy) that you use to calm yourself down and take a step back. A physical activity might be good like going for a run or even hitting a pillow or jumping up and down to music, something like that. Just to release the emotion safely. By involving your boyfriend in the action plan, he could understand what you are doing and why, and it will be healthier for both of you.
Hope this helps and keep us updated with what you decide
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