[sarah: love is everything]

i hate the way i feel. i hate the feelings i have. why can't i be normal? the feelings i have are disgusting. i won't be normal. i need someone in my life to figure out how i feel coz i can't start the conversation. i can't do this alone. i can't keep what i feel a secret anymore. it's eating me up inside. i feel like taking my feelings out on myself, to punish myself for feeling this way coz what will it matter anyway???
who can i trust? who can i trust not to judge me? who can i trust will not change their opinion or feelings towards me? i'm scared. i'm so scared. my feelings confuse me. i can't keep this secret anymore but i also can't risk losing everyone :(