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xbeckyx · 24-06-2008, 09:15 PM

No you have helped.

I don't think I can. If I get through tonight there's only tomorrow. I might feel better but I know I'll only end up like this, a pathetic suicidal wreck, again.

I;m back at CAMHS tomorrow and I'm not sure if I can be honest about this anymore. I don't want tablets to dope me up until I'm safe again, I just want this over with. No one would miss me and I know it's better for everyone. It's supposedly selfish to commit suicide but isn't it also seflish for people to expect you to keep living no matter how crap you feel for them? I can't keep doing this anymore. I'm not sure if I'm scared or relieved now.

24-06-2008, 09:15 PM	#7
xbeckyx Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: North Yorkshire	No you have helped. I don't think I can. If I get through tonight there's only tomorrow. I might feel better but I know I'll only end up like this, a pathetic suicidal wreck, again. I;m back at CAMHS tomorrow and I'm not sure if I can be honest about this anymore. I don't want tablets to dope me up until I'm safe again, I just want this over with. No one would miss me and I know it's better for everyone. It's supposedly selfish to commit suicide but isn't it also seflish for people to expect you to keep living no matter how crap you feel for them? I can't keep doing this anymore. I'm not sure if I'm scared or relieved now.
xbeckyx Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: North Yorkshire	See I cannot feel this, not matter how you try and in the real world, there's no goodbyes. Stare at the hands, you know you want to ;). "memento vivere"