Don't apologize for asking for help. You need just as much help as anyone else here sweetie.
I agree with h122 - try thinking of good things in your life - I know this is hard when you're down so maybe make up a list when you're not feeling so suicidal, for use when you are? The fact that you're still here despite suicidal feelings shows you're incredibly strong even if it doesn't feel like it right now. Just remember suicide is permenant but suicidal feelings aren't. You can get better with help so don't be afraid to ask for it.
Have you told you psych about how you've been feeling? Maybe you could persuade him to give you a longer term prescription of rispiridone as that seems to help you.
Also I'm sure your friends would want to be supportive of you if you asked for help, think about if one of them was feeling like you are now - would you just ignore and abandon them? Of course not so what makes you think that they'll be too busy to help you? and your dad seems to be there for you seeing as he booked you an appointment with CAMHS. You're not alone okay? Everyone on here will be supportive of you honey and noone wants to see your suffering continue.
Don't be afraid of asking for help, my pm box is always open if you want a chat/rant ^.^
Stay safe, remember we're here for you :)
~Emmie
|