I'm not that much of an amazing person or he'dve stayed with me instead of gone to her. He was my best friend, the one person who knew everything about me, the ONE person I let down all my barriers with. And now I have nobody like that in my life. I'm scared. I think I want to stop using drugs but I love the feeling of not feeling the pain. I know what you mean about doing it not to be safe, I guess I kinda think that to myself as well. Maybe I'm sick of the safety net I had with him and I'm seeing how far I can push myself, or something, I really don't know.
Thanks everyone xx
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