Don't feel bad about posting, sweetie :) You have to concentrate on recovering/getting better for you. Reaching out for help doesn't hurt others - but it can be tricky to begin with if you have to dig up buried feelings/traumas to find and solve the root of your SI. You have done brilliantly posting this because now we can try to help you :) Are you getting any proffessional help at all? I hope you enjoyed your run, keep yourself distracted.
xx
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