What small town do you live in? I used to live in a small town about 4 hours away from Sydney.
Please look after yourself.
I know it is really hard to accept, but suicide is a very personal choice. You can't blame yourself for anothers actions. It was their decision ultimately. I understand the guilt and the "if only" or "i should have" and all that, trust me, I understand, but you aren't accountable.
Someone better? If the lady is your wife it is you that she loves. You are the best for her. Better she is with you who she loves then with someone who she doesn't love.
Take care of yourself.
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