He's coming round for dinner tonight, that is if I didn't just scare him off crying down the phone and shouting at him about the rent.
I TEXT my landlady because he won't ring her and I daren't even talk to her right now cause I can't stop crying. TEXT. I'm so out, she's gonna kick me out and I'm gonna have to go back home and all my stuff, I don't even KNOW what I'll do with it. And I will lose my freedom and everything.
Oh god I'm such a mess, I was tidying the flat but now I haven't got the energy again and I'm at work in 2 hours.
God sakes I'm a pathetic heap I don't know what he saw in me in the first place, it's no wonder he doesn't wanna be with me anymore. Or come back to me when I'm being so stupid.
I hate myself so he must hate me too.
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