thank you guys.
*snuggles you both*
i forgot to mention something.
my son's concert is tonight and im here instead of THERE!!!!
i didnt have the money to go.
i spoke to him on sunday and he said it was ok. but i heard his voice cracking. he tries so hard to be strong for me. but mommies know when their baby's are sad.
its killing me. i didnt want to get out of bed today. but i see how much its upsetting Kelly....so i got up and made myself presentable.
i really just wanted to sleep through it all. i know both my aunt and uncle will be there. but mommies are supposed to be there for these things!!!!
i dont know how i will get through tonight. i wont harm. i wont drink. but im sure i'll be taking "happy pills". im really disgusted with myself right now.
i wish i could cry it out. but i had a good cry a few days ago....and who knows when i'll get another one.....
i miss Keith so much. and i have no clue as to when i will see him again. i hope they come for his b-day(july) but i dont know if they will.
ok...ive rambled enough. i feel poo.
