When I'm depressed... I feel completely alone, even if I am surrounded by people, like there's a dark shroud separating me from the rest of the world. I'm consumed by bad memories bad thoughts, and just generally having the worst day of my life, perpetually. At my worst, I feel like I'm just empty, I don't have a point in living, nothing is working out and I can't see feeling better or being productive enough to sustain my life, if you can call it that. And the only way to stop all that, and without hope otherwise, is to finish it all with a razor, or those drugs in the cabinet, or a gun if one could only be gotten.
I never go into such description, that's just how I feel. I describe an episode as just feeling bad all the time, especially when I start thinking.
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