Thread: attention?
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Old 17-04-2008, 09:49 AM   #17
alienshe_cheesycake
the world will never take my heart
 
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Liverpool
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Being 100% honest. I've wanted to cut for attention in the past. But I've never done it.

Not for a kind of, Hey everybody look at me, woooh! kind of thing.
But when I've been at my absolute lowest and I've been close to suicide and I've wanted sombody, anybody to realise that I'm not ok, that I'm really really not ok.
Then I have thought about just "accidently" showing sombody a cut.
Not my family, maybe just like a friend or like one of my tutors in college.
I thought about it, just like rolling up my sleeve a bit by "accident" and see if anybody notices, but in the end I always chickened out.

More just a ; please help me, rather than, please look at me.
But like I said, I never did it.

I couldn't stand my family seeing cuts or scars. They know I do it, but I always, always keep covered up around them.
I used to cut on my legs for the reason that I didn't want them to notice or see what I was doing.
I can't stand seeing the looks on there faces when they see marks on me. Urgh, makes me feel disgusting and stupid. Because I know they think it's stupid.



"In the driest whitest stretch of pains infinate desert, I lost my sanity, and found this rose"

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