Im not diagnosed with BPD, but i used to do what you do, with my mom, last year. I mean i was so sure that she would die and i was calling her every hour and finding lame excuses so that i could hear her voice and see she is ok. I was remembering her last words before she went out, so that if she died, i would remember her last words. When she was late, i was crying and crying, until she had come home, because i was sure that she had died and that she had left me. I was afraid that she would abandon me.
is that somehow how you feel??
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