Hey baby it's OK *cuddles* you're not insane honey you're just hurting really badly inside and it's obviously too much for your mind to deal with.
You do need to talk to someone about this. Yes it should be your GP but if that's too scary then a close friend or relative. They could come to the doctors with you and hold your hand.
Crying is 100% OK... I'm struggling crying at the moment too, I know what you mean about feeling numb.
It will get better honey, I promise *hugs*
xxx
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