HI HUN- YOU ARE DOING GREAT WITH NOT CUTTING- CONGRATULATIONS!
It is a very difficult situation that you are in and one i have complete empathy with. I have been in the same situation so many times and each time i promised myself never again. I hope you manage to work it out- it is a good idea to either keep distance between you and this girl or be completely open with her(risking rejection).
You aren't a freak, so many people fall in love with close friends(whether straight bi or gay), and it can cause complications, but it can also be good.
Sorry this hasn't been great advice. Keep posting hun and let us know how you are.
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