[lower than myself]

So, News Years Eve, a time for a brand new start, time to have fun, dance, get absolutely wasted && so on.

Yeah I done all those && yeah I had fun, up until the point I had an argument with two family members, just so happened to be my fxcking parents. We sarted arguing about my SH, how it was screwing everyone's lives up, cause you know, mine's just not improtant && my nan walked into the room as that topic was being mentioned, she looked at me with disgust && even had the fxcking cheek to mention to all her friends, that her oldest grandaughter, is a screw up that I should be more 'Mautre' that I shouldn't being SH'ing because it's making her look bad.

She didn't give me a second glance, all night, whenever she did look at me, she gave me the evil eye && turned her nose up at me, everyone was just acting like dxcks towards me, refusing to come anywhere near me cause I was like dirt to them. God.

So I run home, in six inch heels, which are rather uncomfortable when your running may I just add, && smash everything up, the parents who are trying to 'protect' me, took everything sharp away, yet again, so I smash a mirror up, I grab the alcohol && pills && just sit there crying, I don't know what was fxcking stopping me, I could have just done it && it would all be over, no more me, no more making my family looking like trash because they can't fxcking deal with me.