Ohh, hun. Please don't tear yourself to shreds. *Hugs* Just explain it to them calmly and rationally. Try and put it in perspective.
I can't really tell you exactly what to say because there are varied reasons as to why people do it. Some to concentrate on physical pain more so than emotional, and some do it to show how bad they are feeling on the inside, some people feel they deserve to be hurt... it is different for everyone. I'm sure they are trying hard to understand you as well as help you. Try and be patient with them. xxx.
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