Hey hun, first off, congradulations on not cutting for so long-resisting those urges is hard work, and you have proved just what a strong, dedicated person you really are *hugs tight*.
I'm really glad you chose to post here instead of cutting. That was a really good move and I hope you can be proud of yourself for that. Has something specific happened recently, that might have triggered this dream and these urges? Or has everything just built up for you?
I think it would be a real shame to give up on all your hard work over a nightmare sweetheart. Would it be possible to talk this nightmare through with someone close to you, or a counseller? Expressing your fears might help you deal with them-the old problem shared problem halfed theory. Other ways of preventing nightmares are taking herbal sleeping remedies such as Kalms an hour or so before you settle down, to help you relax before you go to sleep; to take a hot bath with bubble bath or something that relaxes you; having a non-caffinated milky drink; or even putting something nice like lavender on your pillow to help you chill out and stay calm before you go to sleep.
take care, hope this helped a little,
katy
xxx
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