I am currently panicking about how honest I was (see my RV for more detailed rambling). Like I mostly don't want to die but I want the option. And I barely have the option due to FND anyway and lack of independence. And so moving meds and letting partner know have been more actively suicidal and telling professionals they all make it even less an option as they make acting on thoughts if I decide I want to harder and I am conflicted about that.
Going to try and rest as phonecall plus still recovering from Covid and having flaring asthma and FND have combined to leave me exhausted. Struggling to switch off though
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