How awful that your size is what your mum is most proud of :( When you think of all the things you've achieved as well!! I know it doesn't change anything but I'm so sorry that you were brought up in that way; you deserve so much better.
I'm pleased that you know it's wrong and want so much better for M. There's a book I would recommend for promoting good body image in children, but I worry that you might find it a bit intense and guilt-trippy, so maybe at some point if you feel like you're in a good place I could pass it on to you?
I admit that I don't know a lot about binging but from reading things I'm getting an idea of the shame associated and that's a lot to bear. It seems as though you've got a really fixed idea of 'bad' and 'good' food and I can see that binging on ice cream etc feels bad and is a behaviour rather than listening to hunger cues etc, but do you think that's spilled over into viewing any amount of ice cream/other tasty snacks as 'bad'? And perhaps demonising entire food groups is contributing to things a bit. Like, if in your head having a portion of chocolate is bad anyway, then the forbidden-ness makes it more likely to become a binge?
idk, this feels rambly, I'm sorry if it's completely unhelpful.
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