Thanks for your reply. Outside is still scary and my strict routine wouldn't allow for a walk right now. In this moment I seem stuck on here and unable to go offline. I will at 7pm when my schedule says it's time to put PJs on and try and watch TV. If I can't sit at peace for TV I'll probably come back here. My brain won't focus on much and music can mess up my head even more. I've done all my housework for the day. I'm sorry if it seems like I'm just pushing things away. I'm so stuck in a routine and I worry if I veer off it too much. I will likely be safe tonight. There's no one I could call and I don't have phone bravery right now. I shouldn't have posted this. I might be able to occupy myself with TV soon.
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