Do you think that it might be worth giving your CPN the benefit of the doubt then? It sounds like he might be able to see you more objectively than you can right now.
I also wanted to add to the mirrors thing - on top of your own dysmorphia, it’s worth remembering that psych ward mirrors aren’t always very good at doing accurate reflections - the ones I’ve looked in have always made me look a bit wonky!
Of course I stand by weight gain not being bad, but it helps to remember that body image is a weird thing, and other people often see us differently than we see ourselves.
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