[lostGirl16]

I cut my arm yesterday and the worst thing about the entire thing is that there was absolutely no trigger at all. And there is no way to even begin to understand why I did it. Trust me, I've tried. I overthink everything and I can't justify why I cut yesterday.

My life isn't going that bad at the moment. I have a current love interest that may love me back. I'm only 16 so please excuse my lovestruck tendencies. But I promised him the other day to stay safe and rest. And now I don't know how or if I should tell him about my relapse. He seems to care a lot. But he lacks consistency.

It was just a few small cuts but I really thought that I made a deal with myself as well as Kalum (said love interest). And I thought that I would be able to stick to it but as it turns out.. I can't.

I'm just disappointed in myself. And I don't know if I'll ever be able to get better.

Is it worth it?

Is living worth dying? Is dying worth living for?