Hey :)
It's hard, mourning a life you didn't get to live.
But it's not over. People start again at all ages - go back to uni in their 60s, change careers, move away, get married. It's this weird belief in society that we need to have it all together by the time we hit 30. Who chose 30? Why do we have to listen to them?
I'm 31. I'm in my first year of university. If everything goes completely smoothly and all outcomes are the best (as predicted by me), I will be in my 40s by the time I am qualified for the career I have chosen.
I've also recovered from an eating disorder than nearly destroyed me, taken medication that stole my memories of my entire twenties and lost friends and family along the way. But I finally know who I am, I know who my chosen family are. I get the pressure to be in a relationship and have kids and a career but why is that so important, and why is there a time limit on it?
Also, I don't know you, but the first line of your post stood out to me - you did those things! You did! That's amazing. On top of that I saw your post about self harm. That's massive. And you did that too. I don't think you're giving yourself enough credit for what you have most certainly achieved. I can imagine you have a million replies in your head detailing why I'm wrong, but can you step back for a moment and look at what you've managed to do in spite of the huge odds (yes they were huge), and tell yourself what you'd probably tell someone else presenting that information to you?
You're doing great.
|