I don't know if you have heard of something called the stages of change - but it's something that an old therapist human told me about and I've found helpful. It's a bit similar to the stages of grief. The first step to change is actually becoming aware of the fact that you don't like how things are. The next step is trying to figure out and explore what changes might look like. Then there's others which I can either find a link to or you can google. But basically, just knowing that you aren't happy in your current situation is in itself a step towards things becoming different, because the previous step is essentially being in denial of the situation and insisting things are fine (when they aren't).
I don't know if that is at all useful to think about, but I hope you can continue to try to reach out for support if/when you need.
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