Thank you for your kind words.
I'm feeling really low and I wish I could overdose on X or fall asleep easily to get away from feeling shit. There isn't much that holds my interest or that I can be bothered doing. All I really want to do that is available to me is eat. When I was overdosing on X I didn't realise that it was actually a med that people did abuse. How do I get out? I need to do it chemically but taking drugs wouldn't be sensible and alcohol didn't make my Mum happy. I think X is expensive to just buy and I wouldn't be able to swallow enough anyway. I wish I had felt in a place where I could have communicated to my psychiatrist that my mood is often so low, when I had my appointment with him, but I rarely seem to be able to express my distress during appointed times. I wish something could be done antidepressant/other med wise to help me. This feels like a chemical thing wrong inside my brain, no amount of talking therapy and occupying myself will help. But meds don't seem to help either. Everything is hopeless.
I have a headache and I'm tired. I'm tired of the struggle to sleep and the struggle to live. I know things can only get much worse. I'm sorry but I don't want to continue living.
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