Hey. I relate to so much in your post, you're definetly not alone.
Quote "But the weird thing is that I just know that I wll SI before that month is up, not because i need to, but because I can't bear the idea of going a month without it...Do other people ever feel this way?" Quote
I feel just like that, i feel like well if i don't do it this month at least once its a wasted opportunity.
Quote: It's strange because I know that if I hadn't realised it was almost a month, I wouldn't feel like it all, but since realising it, I've been thinking about it as much as i used to...Like it's not triggered at all, and it's not a craving, and i'm not worried about doing it, i don't really see it as a bad thing, or a good thing, it's just what i have to do. I don't think that makes any sense, but it's hard to explain... Does anyone understand what i mean? Quote
I don't see cutting as bad, or good, its just a thing I do, it makes no sense whatsoever, and I don't know why I do it now, I'm not unhappy, i just do it.
Quote: Also, how far do you think you can go using the decrease of other bad habits as an excuse for others...Like, I feel it's okay to cut every now and then because i'm now eating properly...Is this justified, or am i just kidding myself?Quote
I've given up alcohol because I have a big problem, like i presume you had with eating? Now cutting feels justified for me, ad yes we are kidding ourselves, but it's not that simple- we can't get rid of our habits overnight.
pm me for a chat if u fancy it, would be good to talk xx
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