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Well... hi. How did I end up back here?
Wow, RYL, it has been a few years since we last spoke. New me, new username, still with the same old bad habits. I’m definitely too old for this - god, I even remember when we were “RuinYourLife.” So, here I am back again. A lot has changed, I’ve done some great stuff, I’ve bagged some diagnoses and I’ve made some good decisions and some terrible ones. Hell, I even got my doctorate! I’m great at what I do, I get told how talented I am, the whole nine yards.
It’s still. Just. Not. Enough.
It’s the same old story, I get ‘better’ for a while, then the walls cave in again. I’m struggling. I just can’t hold it together and I can’t stick to healthy coping strategies. My finger is just never far away from the self-destruct button, but I do so well at hiding it all. I hold down a good job, and the sense of responsibility means I won’t just let myself totally fall apart. Good in some ways, bad in others.
Anyway, I just wanted to drop in. I’m not sure what I’m looking for, but for some reason this seemed the place to go even after all of these years.
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