well boyfriend came over last night and we were talking and he was getting close to me and then I just felt so low all of a sudden and I couldnt hide it. He wondered what was wrong with me and it was like my whole body went floppy, I couldnt hold myself up. He stayed with me though and held me for ages. I then whispered with the words I could muster what had happened to me in the past. He was so good to me, he just stayed with me. I then went into major flashback and had the worst asthma attack I have had in a long while. I didnt realise until later but he suffers from asthma too, so luckily it didnt frighten him and together we managed to get it under control.
I then whispered to him about my illness and he didnt flinch. He just whispered back that he understood and told me that in his opinion all I needed was lots and lots of love...
I think I am happy. It's all so strange to me.
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