I gained a ton of weight on various anti psychotics. Couple that with a serious drinking problem and you can probably imagine the disaster.
Anyways, i was angry for an awfully long time. Mainly angry at the medication. Like you, i was sure i'd much rather be crazy than being fat. Until they tampered with my meds and i did indeed go completely bonkers. I spent more than a year becoming more and more psychotic and delusional. It wasn't pleasant. In the end i was too scared to go outside, i had isolated myself completely because other people either scared me or they made me completely furious and i didn't even feel safe in my own flat. I was convinced the entire world was plotting against me and i had made intricant plans as to how to take revenge. I still get the terrible thought sometimes that if i had not been referred back to treatment i would have ended up doing something quite terrible to completey innocent people.
Anyways, tl;dr: Don't stop your meds until you have discussed this and have it approved by your team. Also, i managed to lose some weight while still being on meds. It is not impossible. It is hard and it sucks but it can be done.
What helped me was to calorie count. I used an app on my phone. In fact, i am giving it another go to see if i can lose a bit more.
Also, you can always have chat with your team about yuour concerns regarding your weight. As someone said, they can refer you to a dietician. It is worth exploring other options before stopping your meds. Just sayin'.
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