*kicks up bum*
In all seriousness though, please don't stop taking them. Can you communicate your worries to your CC or GP?
It's good that you can identify that your mood going high isn't a great idea, try to keep remembering that the stability is much better. You also know that when you stop them things don't work out so good either, so it's good to not do that.
You don't feel negatively about any of us who take medication, so you don't need to feel that way about yourself. What would you say if we thought the positive effects aren't real and should be able to manage by ourselves?
You do a great job with managing things, and there's no shame in needing medication to help you to live well. Lots of people have medication for physical illnesses that they need to take to be able to do things and they can't help it. The meds don't put thoughts or feelings into your head, they can just help you to be able to think clearly - its YOU and your own brain that makes the positive thoughts and feelings and that is definitely real.
If all else fails... sticker reward chart: two weeks of full medication = one crocheted cute animal in the post!
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