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Serendipity. · 09-12-2016, 01:05 AM

Thank you all <3 I really really appreciate the reassurance that it gets better and I am not just a rubbish person.

I've done CBT twice now, the last time at the same time as taking meds more or less properly! It has helped, I am better at noticing and challenging unhelpful thought patterns - I still do it, but it's easier to catch myself and change it. It means that I cope better. But I still get really low. I don't think DBT is available in this area and even if it was I don't think I'd ever be offered it because my life is actually really stable. I may be able to start seeing the psychologist but I would be 'supposed' to talk about stuff from when I wasn't well last year and I don't know if I can. I should, but I'm scared to and I also feel stupid that it still affects me.

You are all probably right that being discharged might not be the best thing at the moment. I think I'm frustrated because I'm still struggling and I also feel guilty. I have had a lot of support and I don't feel like I 'deserve' any more. I am kind of surprised that it is still on offer. I am struggling, but I'm also doing okay - full time job, no time off, no self harm, not suicidal. I see people who are in much worse positions being turned away. I know that isn't my fault or responsibility but it doesn't seem very fair.

I did have a medication review. They suggested lithium or failing that lamotrigine but having thought about it, I don't want to try either at the moment. I have another appointment next week, I want to ask about potentially just changing to a different antidepressant, but I don't know whether they'll agree. Fingers crossed. They keep telling me I need to take medication long term but I don't want to and it's frustrating. I am being quite good with taking them though.

No, I'm not very good at allowing myself time to relax properly. I tend to be either busy/out or sitting in bed crying, there isn't really much in between :P I do need to work on that. I need to schedule time to relax and do nice things when I'm at home. I don't feel like I can relax in my room at the moment though because of how much of a tip it is, so I need to try and sort that out as well. Hopefully if I can do that it will help a bit.

09-12-2016, 01:05 AM	#6
Serendipity. fabulous. Join Date: Nov 2010	Thank you all <3 I really really appreciate the reassurance that it gets better and I am not just a rubbish person. I've done CBT twice now, the last time at the same time as taking meds more or less properly! It has helped, I am better at noticing and challenging unhelpful thought patterns - I still do it, but it's easier to catch myself and change it. It means that I cope better. But I still get really low. I don't think DBT is available in this area and even if it was I don't think I'd ever be offered it because my life is actually really stable. I may be able to start seeing the psychologist but I would be 'supposed' to talk about stuff from when I wasn't well last year and I don't know if I can. I should, but I'm scared to and I also feel stupid that it still affects me. You are all probably right that being discharged might not be the best thing at the moment. I think I'm frustrated because I'm still struggling and I also feel guilty. I have had a lot of support and I don't feel like I 'deserve' any more. I am kind of surprised that it is still on offer. I am struggling, but I'm also doing okay - full time job, no time off, no self harm, not suicidal. I see people who are in much worse positions being turned away. I know that isn't my fault or responsibility but it doesn't seem very fair. I did have a medication review. They suggested lithium or failing that lamotrigine but having thought about it, I don't want to try either at the moment. I have another appointment next week, I want to ask about potentially just changing to a different antidepressant, but I don't know whether they'll agree. Fingers crossed. They keep telling me I need to take medication long term but I don't want to and it's frustrating. I am being quite good with taking them though. No, I'm not very good at allowing myself time to relax properly. I tend to be either busy/out or sitting in bed crying, there isn't really much in between :P I do need to work on that. I need to schedule time to relax and do nice things when I'm at home. I don't feel like I can relax in my room at the moment though because of how much of a tip it is, so I need to try and sort that out as well. Hopefully if I can do that it will help a bit.
Serendipity. fabulous. Join Date: Nov 2010	"I know you're sad, so I won't tell you to have a good day. Instead, I advise you to simply have a day. Stay alive, feed yourself well, wear comfortable clothes, and don't give up on yourself just yet. It'll get better. Until then, have a day."