What do you think could make a difference in this way of thinking and contribute to a feeling of wanting to stay in this life????
Hope is a hard feeling to hold on to when you're faced with a course of obstacles that seem to never end. I wish i could promise you an amazing future but sadly that is not in my power. But i want to say that i am a firm believer that during the dark and hopeless times, there is always a lesson to be learned. And there is something to gain even from the bottom of the pit of darkness.
I know it is easy for me to say but i do believe your life can improve. I have not yet met anyone who i percieved as a hopeless case. Sometimes the thought that death is a kind of redemption can be the very thing that stops us from living life to the fullest. I do realise you may think this a load of bullshit but i thought i'd give it a try anyway
