It sounds like you're trying really hard to work with them, and I think that's great. I know it isn't always easy but it will give you the best chance of getting through this as quickly as possible and being able to move forwards. And you can, it gets better! You didn't mess up, it's not your fault. Struggling with your mental health doesn't mean you've done anything wrong. I understand it can be a really isolating experience though. But you're not alone. Lots of people here will be able to relate to what you're going through at the moment.
As tiptoes said, it's just called HTT where I am, and I was with them for a bit last year. I didn't appreciate it at the time and I wasn't able to work with them too well, but in retrospect I can see that it was helpful, and it kept me out of hospital, which for me was a positive thing.
With friends, sometimes people don't really know what to say or how to help; it doesn't mean they don't care though. Do you know what they could do that would help you? e.g. do you need them to listen, or would it help to just spend some time together doing something that you usually enjoy? Sometimes if you're able to let people know what they can do for you, it really helps.
How is uni going? Trying to finish your degree on top of everything else must be pretty difficult. Wishing you all the best with it!
I hope you're doing as okay as possible and managing to take care of yourself.
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