[not_so_insig]

I have been diagnosed with schizophrenia. I have been on medication for 12 years. Yet I struggle to take medication.

I am currently on a depot but when I was on tablets I would refuse to take tablets or only take half the prescribed dose. I am doing a lot better since being on a depot but I very often initially refuse the depot and it takes a discussion with my cpn for me to have it. Sometimes I have refused it outright (earlier on this year I went 6 weeks between depots due to the fact that I refused to have it).

Obviously I am ill otherwise I would have been found out to be a fraud by now. So why do I struggle to accept medication? My regular cpn is off on holiday next time I am due my depot and although another cpn is coming to do my depot I am scared that I will refuse to let anyone else inject me.