I wonder if it has always been like that....???? Or if there have been times where it felt like you could feel it just a little bit, the love????
I am not sure what to say. I think i struggle with the same thing. I do understand that people care about me but i am not sure i can really feel it, within myself. I do agree that it makes life unbearably lonely from time to time.
What i also think is that there is a n awful lot of attention on what love should feel like, what kind of love we should show each other and be shown in return. Sometimes i think it makes for unrealistic expectations. I wonder if you look at others and envy them their ability to feel loved???? I honestly think it's something a lot of people struggle with, so you are not alone in that respect. Though i doubt that's any comfort.
I do understand the loneliness. But i wonder if it is possible to live a good life anyway.....???? At the risk of sounding like a total knobhead, i have come to realise that there is an awful lot of things i won't experience or achieve in my life but maybe i can live a decent life anyway. The loneliness will always be there and the inability to accept/feel the love of others may persist but maybe it is possible to live in spite of that????
When things were ok, or at least better than they are now, did you still feel like your life is a hopeless project or a hopeless search for something you feel you might never find?????
Sorry for waffling on and on. I don't think you're unable to feel the love as such. I think you're probably scared to and have put a lot of obstacles in place to protect yourself. I also think that can be changed but it's probably going to take a long, long time.
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