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Bellatrix · 06-05-2015, 02:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Epicene

J, I can understand how surreal it must be to try and describe the memories. I'm sorry that you went through that, and that your dad didn't notice. Do you think you're struggling more with the memories themselves or the fact that your dad didn't realise? I know what you're going through and am sending hugs.

I think it's a mix of both. I don't blame my dad, though I probably should. I think I'm struggling most of all with the memories. I can still feel their hands on me, hear their voices, see the flash as they took pictures. It's awfully scary. I've taken prn though so hopefully that will help.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Uglyducklin

I thank you so much for this wonderful thread J. I am so sorry everyone is struggling and has suffered so much. Tomorrow I am going inpatient for trauma and my eating disorder. I feel fat worthless and a monster. The images are constant and I know the memories will take over when I eat again and violate myself. I'm terrified it feels so real over and over again x

Good luck in IP. You're not fat or a monster. You're a young woman struggling with terrible things that have happened. You deserve the help and support offered to you and I really hope you can use it. <3

Quote:

Originally Posted by Charmed

J, your experience sounds incredibly distressing, I'm sorry. But well done for writing that, I can imagine that was difficult in itself. Have you opened up to professionals about this? Thinking of you <3

Thank you J, how are you doing? There is no need to worry, I'm just finding it difficult to stay safe. I'm trying to cope with functioning as a human and working, while managing memories, flashbacks, panic attacks, dissociation, and most recently increasing thoughts of suicide, which altogether I'm massively failing! Sorry wow thank you.

Stay safe everyone.

I've talked to my psychologist about it a bit, but not in much detail. I may ask if I can write it all down in a letter to gve to her became I find voicing the words difficult.

I'm sorry you're struggling with flashbacks too. I know it feel really scary, but I try to remind myself after that the're not real, and I'm safe, and nothing like that is happening to me now. Maybe a flashcard would help you to remember it's in the past. You deserve life love. Not suicide.

06-05-2015, 02:31 PM	#19
Bellatrix Voldemort's Bitch Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Everywhere I am currently:	Quote: Originally Posted by Epicene J, I can understand how surreal it must be to try and describe the memories. I'm sorry that you went through that, and that your dad didn't notice. Do you think you're struggling more with the memories themselves or the fact that your dad didn't realise? I know what you're going through and am sending hugs. I think it's a mix of both. I don't blame my dad, though I probably should. I think I'm struggling most of all with the memories. I can still feel their hands on me, hear their voices, see the flash as they took pictures. It's awfully scary. I've taken prn though so hopefully that will help. Quote: Originally Posted by Uglyducklin I thank you so much for this wonderful thread J. I am so sorry everyone is struggling and has suffered so much. Tomorrow I am going inpatient for trauma and my eating disorder. I feel fat worthless and a monster. The images are constant and I know the memories will take over when I eat again and violate myself. I'm terrified it feels so real over and over again x Good luck in IP. You're not fat or a monster. You're a young woman struggling with terrible things that have happened. You deserve the help and support offered to you and I really hope you can use it. <3 Quote: Originally Posted by Charmed J, your experience sounds incredibly distressing, I'm sorry. But well done for writing that, I can imagine that was difficult in itself. Have you opened up to professionals about this? Thinking of you <3 Thank you J, how are you doing? There is no need to worry, I'm just finding it difficult to stay safe. I'm trying to cope with functioning as a human and working, while managing memories, flashbacks, panic attacks, dissociation, and most recently increasing thoughts of suicide, which altogether I'm massively failing! Sorry wow thank you. Stay safe everyone. I've talked to my psychologist about it a bit, but not in much detail. I may ask if I can write it all down in a letter to gve to her became I find voicing the words difficult. I'm sorry you're struggling with flashbacks too. I know it feel really scary, but I try to remind myself after that the're not real, and I'm safe, and nothing like that is happening to me now. Maybe a flashcard would help you to remember it's in the past. You deserve life love. Not suicide.
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