Katie given you understand it a bit more than I am really interested in to what you think *would* be helpful for Carmen, if not the logic discussion.
I think Kims post, her final paragraph, is particularly important about needing help and needing someone who knows how to work with this type of thing to help you. Yes that might mean getting out of your comfort zone and talking about things you feel you can't for a bit.
Thinking of you.
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