I can empathise with your words as I recognise much of myself in what you say along with on some level knowing it doesn't make sense but anxiety prevents your rational mind being sure these beliefs are delusional.
If you've been prescribed an anti-psychotic please take it as instructed, it can really help with those anxiety levels and make it easier for you to keep calm and ignore those delusional beliefs.
I guess on some level it's always seemed simple to me. Although meds are a bit scary to start with and make you feel different you aren't exactly having a lot of fun as you're feeling now.
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