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Auror. · 30-12-2014, 11:10 PM

I'm stuck. I don't know how to stop the same thing from happening over and over again, but professional support doesn't seem to be something I can engage with in a way that they think is acceptable. I can try but it doesn't seem to be enough. I am pretty sure I am going to actually have to kill myself this time, instead of just trying to do enough to hold it off. But I have a dog now and I can't just leave her alone. Plus I am supposed to start school again in another week or so and my mother has forwarded my resume to a friend of hers who may be looking to hire me for a job. Which is also why I have to be dead instead of just in hospital for a day or two.

I stupidly decided to email the doctor lady (psychologist? i think) that I was seeing for a bit. I did not expect a response but now I got one and I don't know what to do with it or how to respond. If I should even bother. I don't seem capable of working with them to the extent they want. There is too much I literally am not allowed to talk about and I don't know how to communicate things properly.

This was her reply:
You are welcome to see me again. However, as we discussed in our last meeting, your participation in treatment would need to be significantly different than it has been in the past. We discussed how we would need to be able to talk about your self-harm and mood concerns, agree to terms of treatment, and work actively toward reducing your self-harm.

If you feel that this is something you'd like to try with me, I'm happy to see you again. This would also be the terms of seeing any other provider in our work group, so if these terms are not agreeable to you, we would need to talk about other agencies/resources that might be helpful to you.

I am out of the office likely until 1-12-15, but if you'd like to schedule an appointment for when I'm back in the office, please let me know.

Can anyone offer any advise? I am sorry for making another post. I really don't know how to stop this and I don't know what to do.

Thank you.

<3

30-12-2014, 11:10 PM	#1
Auror. Camden Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: USA	I don't know what to do with this. I'm stuck. I don't know how to stop the same thing from happening over and over again, but professional support doesn't seem to be something I can engage with in a way that they think is acceptable. I can try but it doesn't seem to be enough. I am pretty sure I am going to actually have to kill myself this time, instead of just trying to do enough to hold it off. But I have a dog now and I can't just leave her alone. Plus I am supposed to start school again in another week or so and my mother has forwarded my resume to a friend of hers who may be looking to hire me for a job. Which is also why I have to be dead instead of just in hospital for a day or two. I stupidly decided to email the doctor lady (psychologist? i think) that I was seeing for a bit. I did not expect a response but now I got one and I don't know what to do with it or how to respond. If I should even bother. I don't seem capable of working with them to the extent they want. There is too much I literally am not allowed to talk about and I don't know how to communicate things properly. This was her reply: You are welcome to see me again. However, as we discussed in our last meeting, your participation in treatment would need to be significantly different than it has been in the past. We discussed how we would need to be able to talk about your self-harm and mood concerns, agree to terms of treatment, and work actively toward reducing your self-harm. If you feel that this is something you'd like to try with me, I'm happy to see you again. This would also be the terms of seeing any other provider in our work group, so if these terms are not agreeable to you, we would need to talk about other agencies/resources that might be helpful to you. I am out of the office likely until 1-12-15, but if you'd like to schedule an appointment for when I'm back in the office, please let me know. Can anyone offer any advise? I am sorry for making another post. I really don't know how to stop this and I don't know what to do. Thank you. <3
Auror. Camden Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: USA	Please do not give me virtual hugs unless you are only using the hug function on threads. Thanks. You can't always keep it separate. This is happening, this is part of you.