My self-harm started when I was about 14, middle of 8th grade I believe. I had already been struggling with depression & GAD for a year from school, bullying, & personal/home issues. One day we were fighting and I became so angry that I had an outburst and locked myself in my room. I used a green, wooden stick that came with an Easter basket (don't really know what it was for, probably decoration) to dig deeply into my arm. I think those scars are almost faded but I can still see them under the rest, now horrid ones.....I quickly upgraded to harsher tools...
Some days I regret even starting because now I've fallen in such a deep hole mentally, and my urges are simply crazy now. This stuff distracts me from doing my work! But hey, this gives me experience, strength, and the ability to help others effectively.
|