Originally Posted by
i-am-a-fever
I was officially diagnosed bipolar in the seventh grade. My unofficial diagnosis is inattentive ADHD, schizoaffective, and OCD. I also have crippling social anxiety (even online), and have - in the last sevenish years - become a virtual recluse because of my agoraphobia, which climbs in severity every day. All of these things run in the family, and my grandmother (my mom's mom) has bipolar, schizoaffective, OCD, and anxiety (but she deals with hers better than I do).
I got a lot of crap for the way I am, from the day I started going to daycare untill I dropped out of the ninth grade after the first semester, which I didn't even complete, because I was absent so much.
I started cutting when I was around ten years old, and the more I got bullied, the worse the self-injury became. It all came to a head in the ninth grade, and my mother pulled me out of school for good because I had a nervous breakdown about it, and upped my therapy sessions to twice a week.
I've got the sh*t for the way I am for my entire life, from peers at school, my dad, his parents, my teachers, my brother, and a couple therapists (one of whom told me that I wasn't cutting for any kind of emotional hangups or whatever, but that I was doing it for attention to show off "how tough I am." Needless to say, I ended the session there and then, and never saw her again).
When I was eighteen, we filed for Social Security, and I got it pretty much right away. I'm still on it, and I don't think it'll change. At least...Not any time soon. I generally have no problem admitting to the fact that I'm on disability, but there have been people - some of whom I considered to be my friends - who've told me that I was full of crap, that I was ripping off the government because I'm lazy, and that I was perfectly capable of getting a job.
It pisses me off when "normal people" don't understand being crazy, and think that people who are crazy are just lazy or whatever. I had a friend who told me that I was ripping off the goverment, and that I was just a whiny little basketcase who was milking the depression thing for all it was worth. This, and the fact that she insulted my family in several different ways, is why I no longer speak to her.
I try to surround myself with people who are crazy as well, because they understand where no one else does. My best friend, Casey, has been my best friend for over eight years. We're not friends because we have shared interests, and like the same things. It did start that way. But not so much anymore. We're best friends, because we share a lot of the same mental issues, and we understand eachother.
So yes, I have got crap for being crazy, and yeah. It f*cking sucks. But I've recently come to the conclusion that anyone who gives people sh*t for being crazy is a c*nt who deserves a highfive. In the face. With a hammer.
Yes, I am crazy. But one of the most important things I've discovered in my twenty-five years: All the best people are.
Question: In the poll, what does that mean? Rusty spoons? o.O
To be honest, when i read this it just seems just as discriminating against people with no mental illness. Saying that all the best people are crazy.
Thats honestly not how i find it. There are good people without mental illness and bad, just as there are crazy people as you call them who are both good and bad. Its not whether they are "crazy" or not that defines what type of person they are.
In my experience, surrounding yourself with only people who are mentally ill can be bad as well. Often in these groups where veeryone is sick mentally it can get a bit competitive but also if one falls, all falls and illness and unhealthy behaviors often becoems normal where it shouldnt.
Its fine to have someone who understands and i too have friends with mental illness but it is not that, that has decided whether they are friends or not. However, you dont just automatically become understanding or caring just because you are ill. Often you are too warped up in your own shiit that handeling others can be hard. I have a few friends from hospital/therapy and thats fine but i often witness the people ive been ip with having these sorts of "crazy only" friendship groups and they are rather disfunctional a lot of the time. Not to say there isnt anything good in them and that i dont understand it. Its hard meeting people who are not sick when you dont work and spend all your time in hospital and therapy and you do become close with people when you practically live together in hospital. However, only having those friends and relying on them isnt always good as it is fragile when everyone is unstable.
The majority of my friends are people who are not ill. They are odd in personality as i like it and we share the same interests etc. But not ill. My boyfriend didnt know much of mental illness before he met me. I find the important thing isnt whether they understand to begin with but that they are open and trying to understand. No they wont know what its like to feel or experience what i do but a lot of people with even the same diagnosis as me, doesnt either as its an individual thing. But they are willing to ask questions and listen and learn without judging. And plenty of non crazy people are like that. Not all are assholes.
My ex boyfriend was a nutter and i met him on this site. It did not mean he was understanding to my issues when we started dating though or that he was one of the best. Quite the opposite. He was vile and cruel. The cruelest person i have ever met who found joy in manipulating, controlling, stressing me and he would upset me on purpose, do the things he knew pushed me over the edge and made me do extreme things that could cost my life and then be the "worried and supportive" boyfriend after. He seemed understanding, sweet and charming to begin with but turned out the complete opposite. And he was ill, a self harmer, crazy as you say but he certainly wasnt any of the other things you describe crazy people as. Ive have met plenty of people who were mentally ill but bad people.
Good people comes in all forms. Crazy or not crazy, slim or overweight, pretty or not pretty by societys measures. The same as the bad people.
You cant generalise the way you do. Mentally ill people are not more likely to be good people than people who are not. Me for one, has had just as much judging and prejudice from people who claim to also have mental illness as i have from people with no illness. An illness doesnt define a person.
Yes, people who have been through similar find it easier to relate and understand to a degree and its fine to use that. But people with no mental illness can often relate as well but in a different way and its not whether someone understands completely how you feel to begin with but that they are willing to learn to understand by being open and by listening.
I just didnt want this thread to turn into us against them as this post really felt like.