Today was terrible. Therapy didn't go so great and then I had an appt with my psych straight after and it was a disaster. He's accusing me of refusing treatment but I'm not. I'm not. I don't wan to take poison. I don't want to. He tried to come to a compromise but I can't keep taking the pills. He wanted to take two weeks to halve the dose of one medication. I'm on 4. And that one was the newest. I'd be dead and then what would happen. I'm trying to do what's best for everyone. People like the world being here don't they?
He then said to go into hospital and be observed coming off them but that's irrelevant because they haven't been the prescribed meds for weeks. I think now I'm going to be monitored by my GP coming off them but he mentioned a mental health act. They can't do that. I'm not crazy or ill.
I'm not deliberately being difficult I'm so ****ing scared. I don't even know now. I want to believe they're not poison but I can't. I just can't. I almost walked out of the appt but didn't think it would go down well so I didn't.
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