I have/do work in mental health (though this has been interrupted by illness at various points). I don't want to create more controversy in what is a valuable thread, but I do have a couple of questions for you Paranormal. You don't have to answer them here, it just might be something to reflect on.
Firstly, I am slightly concerned about the fact that you work as a mental health nurse and yet you still feel so much shame about your self-harm. I'm wondering why that is. I would hope that any nursing course would encourage open-mindedness and understanding, and even more so for mental health nursing. It feels worrying that after three years of training, someone is judging their own self-harm so harshly. Obviously it's not a behaviour to be normalised or 'condoned', I just think it's a shame and that the course you were on is probably doing something wrong.
The other question is the fact that you do sometimes need to call in sick on bad days. It is illegal to withhold information on any current condition that impairs people from doing their job effectively and safely. If the absences are reasonably frequent, it may be something you have to raise even if it feels difficult. But, the benefit of this is that you will probably be offered more specific support. As long as you can do your job, there is no reason why a history of significant MH issues (or ongoing milder issues) should be a barrier to work.
Personally I've always been honest about my mental health (maybe more so than actually necessary), but I've found it much easier that way. I typically would be more open with colleagues than clients, but it very much depends on the role. Something like a peer supporter or involvement officer may actually require disclosure, whereas nursing is more about providing others with care. When I've been a support worker I've always kept my scars hidden and even attempted to hide low body weight when anorexic, but simply out of consideration for the potential that a client may get triggered.
Hope that answers some of your questions and hasn't caused offense in any way! You've definitely done something right to get to where you are today, and your story is amazing.
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